The Big Release!

Hello and welcome back! It has been slightly quiet on our front and I’ll tell you for why..

Chicken Corner has been truly appreciative of such a sunny Easter this year, particularly as it marked the official end of “cluckdown” (A very serious pun from The Telegraph on 03/04/2021). And just pipping their human counterparts to the post! Lucky them!

But let’s whisk the lovely reader back in time.. to a very dark and cold time known as 2020. Unknown to the majority of humanity - too consumed in their own lockdown misery - since mid-December 2020 all feathered friends of the UK have undertaken their very own lockdown.. in sympathy to their 21st-century humans perhaps?

Well no, actually wild birds and poultry are fighting their very own rampant virus: Avian Influenza in strains H5N8, H5N1, H5N2 & H5N3. The compulsory cluckdown was implemented to protect flocks across the UK from the disease which was (and in fact still is) circulating in wild birds. Poultry found to be harbouring the viral strains were to be humanely culled.

You thought your lockdown was bad! Imagine the fear of certain death when receiving a ‘positive’ NHS text message! On another note, at least you received governmental updates, daily(!) in lockdown 1.0 and ok.. admittedly fading out during 2.0 and 3.0, but still! At least the freedom of ignorance was proudly practiced, particularly by those of you who actively avoided the propaganda updates at approximately 15:00 GMT+1. Also, you weren’t kept in the dark (too much) about when the masses would eventually be released. Chickens were far worse off in my opinion.

Poultry didn’t get the same treatment.. not even one news report for members of chicken corner to choose to avoid! (Ok they may not have access to an actual television but that’s not the point!) Of course there were the original gov.uk advice guidelines outlining the restrictions and how pet owners and the poultry industry in general must abide by new rules.. but after that, nothing. It got to the point that in February we were asking a vet on Instagram whether the lockdown was still going on.. as Google decided to be unhelpful.

Unsurprisingly a month and a half later (3 weeks in perpetual darkness and a month in an aviary-style enclosure) made the members all feel rather cabin-feverish and abandoned :(

Indoor facilities with sufficient ventilation, air-circulation and personal-space were lacking in the orchard. The “aviary” was undoubtedly a tenuous contraption but as Director and Manager I really had to put the welfare of my members first. Similarly to the Covid pandemic, news reports (not strictly a relevant example as no news reports for poultry as previously pointed out).. but what I’m trying to say is, we’re all very focused on Covid and preventing the spread of it, but simultaneously disregarding the idea that other life-threatening diseases still exist!

So – yes we were trying to prevent the spread of particular strains of avian influenza, but do the means really justify the end here?

For those who weren’t adequately prepared (as one might be, because one generally buys chickens with the intention of allowing them outside for 70% of their days), could the “cluckdown” and the conditions birds were being kept in actually be more detrimental to their health in the small-scale and short (& long)-term?

For example, 10 chickens in a small space with limited light and ventilation could manifest other chronic respiratory diseases & mite and lice infestations. These could lead to the same two results – 1. Death 2. Undesirable or unknown diseases entering the human food chain.

Taking the above into consideration and picturing a snowy February, the more spacious “aviary” re-arrangement was well underway (of course sticking to the enclosure rules), but ultimately with the health and best-interests of my birds at heart!

N.B. All images are taken from the “Big Release” on 1st April 2021.

Well Chicks, I hope you are as happy as these chickadees!! x

Friday

Three years on from Burberry’s Knitwear campaign featuring Chicken Corner’s oldest Buff Orpington hen (a recognisably pivotal moment in the celebrity status of the orchard), we’re reclaiming your screens in a most-likely short-but-sweet feature with the British Broadcasting Corporation AKA the BBC. For reasons listed in Sidney Street’s terms & conditions, (which family members were encouraged to sign in order to make an appearance on the show), it would be inappropriate and downright a breach of contract to disclose any further details relating to this “said programme”.

So rather than dwell on this, prepare yourselves for a detailed re-telling of that fateful Friday filming in October. Stylistically comparable, no doubt, to novelist Ian McEwan, expect long, drawn-out flashbacks with sporadic leaps to the present ensuring a single day’s events fill up a 300+ page book. But don’t panic, I’ll just aim for a page, promise..

Having been sent the filming timetable by Olivia on the Thursday evening, the realisation that Chicken Corner only had a 30-minute window to show its full potential seemed daunting. The camera crew, which turned out to be three freelance human bubbles*, were set to arrive at 8:15 the next morning. From the start of this fiasco however, miscommunication was residing over us like a high-quality umbrella, not the unspeakably terrible freebies given out by certain companies (that will not be mentioned for fear of damaging reputations and future sponsorship opportunities).

Communication’s arrows missed their targets very early on.. and hard lessons were learnt. Although an arrival time had been clearly stated, Olivia and S.A.Rainey started to confuse matters. Various times were thrown into the mix, ranging from 7AM to the supposed 8:15AM.. if my memory serves me correctly, the standard people carrier drew up the yard at about 8:20AM.

Building up to the arrival, of course excitement was through the roof, mainly fuelled by Olivia who couldn’t wear a particular rustic jumper because she’d been getting advice from Will, famously credited in the fashion industry Worldwide, oh wait! She also refused to wear a nordic turtleneck of mine because “it suits you, Cecily, but I don’t like it and its just not me”.. Thanks Olivia, I will treasure your words boundlessly..

By far, the worst miscommunication saga orientated around Olivia’s highland pony, Monty. To the horror of my older sisters, I had mucked his stable out before 8:20AM. In reaction, a percentage was re-deposited in the stable. Apparently it could contribute to some thrilling camera content according to Izzi and Olivia. Words on initiative were spoken but I hastened to add that telepathy is not a skill I possess and how was I supposed to know not to muck out the pony if nobody physically instructs me! Assumption should be this family’s motto as we are so very good at it.

While Izzi was off being filmed with the cattle, Olivia and I entertained the day by riding Monty round the Village. The next action I took; seeming so harmless, possibly even helpful at the time – collecting Monty from the field – well, I’ve never regretted anything so much. How I wished to click my fingers and teleport back to that very moment to crush that insolent thought.. for the fury it brought in so little time, groundbreaking! I couldn’t quite believe it ..in short, the cameras caught me collecting Monty from the field and because he is Olivia’s part of the farm, she should have been documented with him. Emotions were running high and like a born Director and Manager, I admitted my error and sort to right the wrongs. Thankfully, the crew captured Olivia riding Monty. Within the hour, jokes were already being banded about.. too soon perhaps, noting the difficult crowd ;)

During Chicken Corner’s half an hour moment of fame, awkward conversations and laughter were at an all time high. Luckily presentation wise, the orchard and its members looked fantastic and the constant stream of food (to ensure key shots were captured) was welcomed with open wings!

An emotional and draining day spent haphazardly recording footage of the farm with members of the family, resulted in an exhausted Director and Manager on the sofa with legs outstretched across S.A.Rainey, taking in the dreary yet stoical ITV series ‘Vera’…

You are free to take from that what you will.

Bye Chicks x

The Ageing Process

No matter your age, size, feather type or gender … (although, generally we do tend towards 90:10 female to male ratio) every members’ perfections and imperfections are celebrated here at Chicken Corner!

To cover the updates gap from July and early August, let’s take a pit-stop at our inevitable and infamous friend ‘age’.. well well, it’s a love-hate relationship, being an utterly irreversible and ironic part of life. (Apart from Benjamin Button, who defied the laws of physics and lest we forget the narcissist, Dorian Gray – but it got him eventually). Are we fearful of aging or should we embrace it as a privilege; embedding us in the great circle of life?

I have performed some critical data analysis on the members of Chicken Corner, and results have concluded that a small-but-ever-increasing-majority are aged beings. When shaking the food bucket to signal mealtime (N.B. the most recognisable sound in Chicken Corner apart from my rhythmic clap and adjoining ‘hello chicas’ which normally produces a similar excitable reaction).. certain aged features manifest in various ways.

Two-legged bodies that once sprinted and half-meter long wingspans that flapped, propelling them off the ground in a desperate attempt to be the first to afternoon tea, are now reduced to plodding and limping. A combination of too much baggage in the lower tummy department and stiffening of joints over several years, mean these OAP’s aren’t as spritely as they once were. Its not all doom and gloom though, because upon reaching the food distribution area, the appetites of these hens have and probably will NEVER decreased. Who doesn’t love eating, hey?

Nevertheless, certain senses do appear to take a tumble in the aging process. The oldest Buff Orpington hen AKA Burberry Model has been experiencing tunnel vision for a number of years. Her eyelids nowadays fail to open fully, which makes everyday tasks such as eating, a challenge. Have no fear though, as your respected Director and Manager is on constant surveillance and as part of the residential experience, I cater to the specific needs of our members. In essence, I create piles of wheat so that she can generally understand the zone of food and then just dive in beak first, sure never to miss her target!

Loss of balance also catches these older hens out sometimes, but they prop themselves up resourcefully with an outstretched wing “Nothing to see here, thanks!”

HEAT. Don’t get me started on heat and its effects on the older population! Resilient creatures as they are, chickens (young and old) find innovative ways to keep cool in overwhelming temperatures. Unable to sweat like us humans or swim in the sandpit like the ducks.. they find shade, breathe heaving through widened beaks and drop their wings to allow cool air to circulate among their feathers. Another thing – they drink A LOT of water. There was a rather magical moment last week in the peak of the afternoon’s temperatures – I filled up the various iron water troughs (actually for sale if anyone’s interested!) Proceeding to sit nearby, I experienced the Chicken Corner equivalent to a Saharan safari adventure. Around the ‘waterhole’, all manner of creatures came to drink, and others joined to see what all the hullabaloo was about.. (a slow hullabaloo obviously due to the heat)..

So no, we here at Chicken Corner do not fear age but embrace it, as natural deteriorations spark new survival reactions. These matriarchs are the foundations of our community and proudly represent the longevity and constancy in the (4-apple tree) orchard.

Stick to the shade and stay safe!

Bye, Chicks x